“Little by little,” I shouted through my car window to his. “Day by day,” he smiled back.
It was the very beginning before we had any clue where we were going or that it would even work at all — him a refugee chef from an African village by the ocean, me a bustling business woman with a somewhat shut-down heart. But we’d felt it from moment one. That undeniable pull. That fateful glistening luster. That calm but insatiable curiosity. That firmly rooted trust.
I’d need months of deliberating and debating. Testing for all the faults. Then giving up on testing, shutting down or shutting out, and instead inviting him into my heart to meet me in all the ways that felt like home.
I sent him a text a few months in when the speed was picking up and the intensity of devotion rising. I told him the definitions of the words pendulation and titration. Going back and forth between difficult and easeful. Micro-dosing the intensity instead of pouring it all on. I told him I teach these things to my clients and need to practice them with our love, because even though it’s amazing, holy shit my world just got spun around 360. He told me that was a great idea, he’s on board all the way.
All the way. What gives us the capacity to go all the way in? Wholeheartedness. (Not lying to ourselves about our truest sense of yes or no.) Worthiness. (Uh huh. I deserve to FEEL GOOD.) Presence. (I can witness and breathe through the bigness.) Lightness. (I can laugh at the intensity of it all.) Prob some other big things.
What I know is this: love is a mystery and life is always inviting us to practice it.
Growing our capacity to be all the way true with ourselves gives us the capacity to be all the way true with another.
The rest feels like destiny and divine timing.
If you wanna practice the foundations of staying all the way true to you so you can be all-in on love, check back here tomorrow…
I’ve got something free and amazing I’m offering. 🙂
love love love,